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Plonker is a song by Ackroyd. It is usually played as last song in their setlist because of its ethereal sound and noisy ending.

Lyrics Edit

They get on with life as a nurse, They're a strange kinda type. They like train spotting on Sundays, They like playing golf in the week. They like to contemplate cigs. But when they start to daydream, Their mind turns straight to love.

Sometimes I look at them and I look into their eyes,
I notice the way they think about love with a smile,
Curved lips they just can't disguise.
But they think it's cigs making their life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for them to decide which they love more?
Cigs or...
Love?

They like to use words like 'plonker,' They like to use words like 'muppet.' They like to use words about cigs. But when they stop their talking, Their mind turns straight to love.

Sometimes I look at them and I look into their eyes,
I notice the way they think about love with a smile,
Curved lips they just can't disguise.
But they think it's cigs making their life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for them to decide which they love more?
Cigs or...
Love?

They like to hang out with Tom, They like to kick back with Matt, But when left alone, Their mind turns straight to love.

Sometimes I look at them and I look into their eyes,
I notice the way they think about love with a smile,
Curved lips they just can't disguise.
But they think it's cigs making their life worthwhile.
Why is it so hard for them to decide which they love more?
Cigs or...
Love?

They're not too fond of hate, They really hate crime, But they just think back to love, And they're happy once again.

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